Since I had been there many times, I took the lead with my lovely daughter at my side. We had to walk around the trail from the site to the main center, and then turn onto the dirt road that eventually wound around to the highway. The lake and campsites were lower than the road to our left, and at the other side of the road where it had been cut out was a ledge about four feet above us on the right.  We were all chatting and taking a gentle stroll as we took in the company and the landscape.

That is when the noise and the frightening energy suddenly stopped us dead in our tracks. Oh, did I say dead? Not really, but I guess we could have been had things gone differently. I absolutely knew that what was above us on the ledge was not happy with our presence. And it was not a physical being. I knew it to be a potentially dangerous spirit animal. I just did not know what it was because I did not remember ever experiencing that particular energy. To say we were all startled would be a complete understatement.

The pounding and roaring continued, yet did not seem to be getting any closer.

Two of the women wanted to run away. I stopped them because I knew that would be dangerous for everyone. I made them stay together as I advanced toward whatever we had disturbed.

I found a way to scurry up the embankment and stand on the ledge in full warrior mode, ready to take on any potential threat.

What I saw indeed looked menacing. It was a large angry Bearcat! Not the type of small animal you find in Asia. On no! This was larger than a Grizzley and a truly magical blend of bear and sabretooth tiger. It looked very much like the picture I put at the top of this blog.

There was a cave about 30 paces back from the road and the Bearcat was there watching me as I climbed up to meet it. It was bouncing back and forth on its front legs bearing very long fangs and emitting a strange yowl somewhere between the roar of the two animals, while huffing and snorting. Its eyes were blazing and you could see that its fur was standing straight out. It was huge! There was no question that it was there to protect this space and did not want nighttime visitors strolling about.

What amazed me as I stood there, eyeball to eyeball with this huge beast, was my lack of fear and sense of recognition! I had known this beautiful being sometime in the past. Not in this lifetime, but another time, long ago. I knew it was female and she was protecting not only her home and the land, but a cub hiding somewhere back in the cave.

As I recognized her spirit, she stopped her agitated behavior and began to stand there still and quiet. It was enthralling. She was so familiar to me and I felt such immediate love for her that I was close to crying.

She turned her head back and forth watching me like a house cat studying a new toy. She was now completely calm and not threatening at all. After all the previous ruckus it was an amazing change.

I thought of the women below on the road, and how frightened they must be. Without moving, I called over my shoulder that we were all safe and I would be on the ledge for a little while. I heard the sounds that people make when they have been holding their breath and breathe signs of relief. There was a little low murmuring between them with my daughter’s calming voice most prominent. She understands some of the things I get myself into and could tell I was safe. She was doing her best to help them relax and wait for me.

I looked back at the BearCat and we began a type of telepathic communication. I began to understand her story, and our shared story.

Thousands of years before, in another life, I had been assigned the task of setting guardians in place for the lake and surrounding environment. I knew that there were many other beings besides that magnificent being I had just met. I had asked her to come to earth in spirit form to be a guardian of the land. She had agreed and was in that same place all that time. In fact, I can still feel her presence there to this day. There were other guardian BearCats scattered throughout that portion of the Sierras charged with the same task. Gratefully, she has not been alone. Obviously so, since she had a cub.

I was pleased to know that she had occasional companionship. Since she is telepathic, I knew that they all communicated over long distances, and even visiting; keeping each other company in their vigils.

I don’t think I asked for her name, and if I did it is long gone from my memory. But her essence and pure spiritual glory is burned indelibly in my memory and my emotions.

I asked if I could approach. She let me know both physically and psychically that she would like that. I walked up to this enormous and fearsome looking being with joy and the sense of reunion with a long lost friend. Fangs, claws and all. She let me stroke her beautiful fur. Yes, I know she is not physical, but in that state of awareness we were very solid and real to each other. She snuffled my breath, my hair and my neck. I embraced her neck and hugged her as she wrapped her neck and one paw about my body. I have no idea how long we stood that way. I was entranced.

Eventually, I heard a quiet voice calling. “Mom? Are you ok? Is it safe?” I realized even my daughter was beginning to be rather concerned, that I must soon finish my visit, and go back to the people that were waiting for me.

I thanked the BearCat for being such a great guardian for such a long time, and for the time that I knew she would continue in the future. A very large tongue on my neck joined thoughts of love and re-commitment to her duties; letting me know that all was well.

I let her know that I would have to go but would remember her throughout this entire lifetime, and certainly on a spiritual level for much longer. One last hug. I turned and left to rejoin the human world. I heard a deep sigh from her as I left, and little tiny mewling from within the cave. Her cub was calling, probably as concerned about her mother as my friends and daughter were about me. She went back into the cave as I climbed over the embankment and back to the road.

It was so bittersweet and enlightening to discover that amazing being, and to realize how lucky I was to be safe in her presence.

Everyone wanted to know what happened and seemed very relieved that I had finally returned safe. Frankly, they were very amazed that they were safe as well. I said that I simply needed a short time to process what had happened and I would talk about it when we got back to camp.

After all, I had gone to face what I knew was a powerful and potentially dangerous being without a moments hesitation. Part of me had to ponder that part of my adventure along with the beautiful being with whom I had just spent time. I sometimes really wonder about myself in those situations. Courageous? Foolish? What is it that drives me forward with such resolve? Ah well…. it is who I am and I can be no different.

It was not a liesurely stroll back to the camp. It was nearly a marathon! Everyone quickly scurried along. There was a lot of excited discussion between the other women on the way back.

One of the women with me, Victoria, was very quiet and contemplative on the way back. I suspected she had made some sort of deep connection with the magical being as well. She acted both very calm and somewhat puzzled by the experience. I know her for a pure and highly intuitive soul so I let her sit with her own thoughts.

Once back with the other women I was pressed to tell the story in complete detail multiple times with many questions. One of the women who had stayed by the fire was new to this spiritual and magical world so she was rather freaked out for a while, but soon recovered and asked more questions than anyone else.

We discussed how we felt about being safe and under the unique guardianship of the BearCat. Quite a new experience for our little group. My daughter sat with a knowing and somewhat amused smile through much of the remaining evening. It tickled me to watch her watch me and the others as we dissected the experience. I was glad I had an opportunity to teach about the magic that surrounds us which we seldom recognize.

Many other magical events took place during that trip. I plan to write about at least some of them at a later date. The entire retreat was wonderful and nurturing.